Reality Check
By Alice Liu
Reprinted from Comic Bible
I recently had the opportunity to attend a highly publicized "networking" party and noticed that most of the people who had been looking forward to the event were sitting on the sidelines, looking uncomfortable and keeping to themselves. Networking is an art. It is a learned trait that needs to be developed and refined.
The most common problem with networking seems to be one of unrealistic expectations. To many, it's just a variation of "being discovered" - finding someone so taken in by you that they will sign you on and bankroll you in a heartbeat. In reality, networking involves the meeting and sharing of information among peers. They can be peers at a social or professional level, or both. If two people are not peers, invariably it leads to an uneven relationship where one is being used by the other. Why would a person in a position of power gladly network with people who want to take advantage of them? They don't. They need an incentive, whether it be the enjoyment of your company because it's so pleasurable hanging around with you, or for the benefit of your skills for their professional endeavors.
Networking is work and can be difficult to figure out. Knowing who you are and what you have to offer is key. You have to be realistic about what you have to offer, and keep your expectations in line with that. If you feel you are not ready to meet a certain individual on a professional level, you can certainly get to know them on a social level. Networking, this is relationship building. You can easily lose your reputation by not following through on promises or by lying/exaggerating. When people have reached a certain higher level in your profession, they have met thousands of people in your position. They can probably see right through you if you have a hidden agenda, and they probably don't appreciate when you try too hard to please them. Remember, if you "kiss ass" you become a fan and not a peer.
Alice Liu is a musician, actress, and author.
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