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Horrorscopes con't.

than a team of loin clothed, sweaty, jocks dangling golden medallions, the fruits of their athletic prowess, above your bulging, red lips. Though you often lead from behind, in this race you shine!! You hunger for a sugar daddy. Must I spell it out for you! You, sweet Taurian, are gay. Oh, the surprise! Oh, the shock! Oh, please. Stop kidding yourself. You will thank me one day. Other horoscope writers try to hide this truth from you. They say, “you will have trouble with the opposite sex today. Watch out for the opposite sex. Stay away from the opposite sex.” Read between the lines! They won’t give it to you straight or as straight as you can take it. But not me, a dirty, muscle laden commando. You like that image don’t you. You are a bull dyke and a bull rider in one. March your gay ass, all over this gay island and be proud. Ole’.

Writer, Comedian and Fun-loving Feminist Becky Donohue, has been performing her righteous & riotess act in clubs all over the country.

see more from Kelly here

Kelly's Korner...

By Kelly Bowlin

Dear Kelly,
I've run into a serous case of writers block. My friends think my writing is dull and I'm thinking about giving up and writing travel pieces.
Thanks, Charles Somebody.

Dear Chas....
It must be serious if you're considering travel pieces. I'd suggest you go back to comic basics and there's no better place to start than your bowel movements and flatulation. Nothing gets a good laugh like potty humor. Haven't you ever farted in a crowded mall and tried to out-run it? What about a prank fart machine in a crowded theater. If that doesn't work, what about an embarrassing three drink e-mail or butt dial? Lastly there's always parody. Find something you think is annoyingly boring and turn it into a funny sketch. Good Luck.

Kelly Bowlin is a freelance writer based in Los Angeles. He currently writes script and has been published in Yahoo, Suite 101, Digiguide, and utopian realms. He’s written two novels and a collection of 26 short stories titled The Modern Wild West in Shorts.